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I hate spiders

Yes, I realize that I am not alone in this feeling. But tonight after adammaker left (we'd watched the new "Eureka" episode and Mars Attacks! as dessert), I decided I could not sleep without thoroughly toxifying the house's perimeter inside and out. Why, you ask? Well, because during a bathroom break I killed two fucking Brown Recluse spiders upstairs, that's why, and I didn't want to get bitten by one for my third year in a row.

I made a scooter-trip out to Wal-Mart, that paradise of shopping (er, what I mean to say is, "the only place that's open at 1am for paranoid bug-combatants") and bought a couple gallons of anti-spider poison. Got home and poured one gallon along the house's walls and foundation outside, then squirted half the second gallon along bug-friendly pathways up the walls, then went inside and squirted all along the bases of the walls upstairs and down, in the attic-room, plus in the cupboards and fireplace and furnace area.

Then a shower, as I didn't really gear up properly and my nose was running something fierce. By now the liquid has dried up, it's damned late, and I feel confident that nothing can survive breaking into the house. To bed!

Here's wishing you no spiders,
Chris

Comments

( 35 comments — Leave a comment )
astein142
Aug. 2nd, 2006 12:23 pm (UTC)
I don't mind spiders as long as they stay in their space and stay out of mine. At that point I engage the chemical-free, 100% organic, rubber mallet method of arachnid annihilation. Sure, it leaves dents in the floor, but it sends a strong warning to the trespasser's comrads lurking in the shadows under the couch...
mckitterick
Aug. 2nd, 2006 05:27 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I've been doing that for a while now, but then I heard what Brown Recluses look like and identified 'em upstairs. Deadly spiders are not allowed in my house, dammit! And the mallet method is a bit too slow.
tessagratton
Aug. 2nd, 2006 02:43 pm (UTC)
We were told that brown recluse spiders need a special kind of extermination to get rid of them, because unlike most spiders, they actually lift themselves up off the floor and therefore don't drag their bodies through the poison...

We used Haley's pest control on June 2nd, and we're STILL finding dead spiders around the floorboards.
mckitterick
Aug. 2nd, 2006 05:27 pm (UTC)
Dammit and eek. Okay, how much does this Haley's cost?
tessagratton
Aug. 2nd, 2006 09:33 pm (UTC)
They were just over $100 I believe, to dust the whole house and baseboards outside, I think... I'll ask Natalie, too. She remembers that kind of thing better.
roseconnelly
Aug. 2nd, 2006 02:52 pm (UTC)
Are you sure it was a recluse? We have a lot of big brown spiders that aren't actually recluses. Did it have the fiddle on its head? Or if you kill one, you can peek at its eyes. Brown Recluse has only 6 instead of the normal 8.

Just asking because unless you see the spider and spray it directly, most spider poisons do not kill brown recluses, but it does kill their food. So, if you are spraying all over and you do have brown recluses, you are just creating a smorgasbord for them. They will in turn invite their friends, and you will have more.

Plus, they won't bite you unless you taunt them. They are most dangerous, say if they are in a pile of clothes that you step in and press up against the spider. Or there is one nestled in your bed covers and you roll over on it. They won't find you, crawl up on you and bite you.

mckitterick
Aug. 2nd, 2006 05:31 pm (UTC)
Yup, I took a good look at it before squishing it because I had thought these were just normal spiders. I know they won't seek me out to try to kill me, but those bastards have bitten me twice before (presumably in my sleep) and I don't want any more.

That my poisoning might not have worked makes me very unhappy.
roseconnelly
Aug. 2nd, 2006 05:44 pm (UTC)
I believe you. I had them in my basement when I lived over by you. My washer and dryer were down there, and I would seperate my laundry in piles on the floor. Mistake.

I discovered them when I sprayed down there to kill the crickets. Day one, there were dead crickets laying of the floor. Day two, all of them were gone. I didn't realize that I was feeding my spiders.

I got trapped down there with one, and I hate them so much that I just stood there for what seemed like forever, just wishing that it would crawl away. I finally build up enough courage to grab a laundry basket, throw it on the spider, and then jump in the basket. It made a horrible crunching noise that at the time made me nauseated and dizzy. Today, it haunts me with shivers and goosebumps.

I'm not coming over to your house. Let us know when they are gone.


mckitterick
Aug. 2nd, 2006 05:51 pm (UTC)
Wow, the poison in the crickets didn't kill those who ate them? Ye gods. I'm less pleased with myself for poisoning the area now.
kijjohnson
Aug. 2nd, 2006 03:18 pm (UTC)
Spiders suck. Good luck. I occasionally find enormous spiders in my place, but they dispatch easily -- which is to say, I catch them in a glass and take them across the street and release them there, because I can't bring myself to kill anything that would make a squishing noise when I hit it.
weaselmom
Aug. 2nd, 2006 04:25 pm (UTC)
I occasionally find enormous spiders in my place... No you don't. NO, YOU DON'T. Right? RIGHT???
kijjohnson
Aug. 2nd, 2006 04:27 pm (UTC)
Actually, no. They're voles.
weaselmom
Aug. 2nd, 2006 06:18 pm (UTC)
Ah. Nature's Cheeseburgers.
mckitterick
Aug. 2nd, 2006 09:19 pm (UTC)
Harumph. I don't think our Vole-American friends feel that way.
weaselmom
Aug. 2nd, 2006 09:57 pm (UTC)
In one of my nature books, there was a statistic about what would happen if they *weren't* Nature's Cheeseburgers. I forget the timeline, but in X amount of time an unmolested mating pair would generate enough offspring to cover the earth 16 feet deep in voles. And X was a small number. So it's *good* that they're just convenient little protein packets for predators. Weasel 1 to Weasel 2: "You know? I could really go for a vole right now." Weasel 3 to Weasel 4: "What's for dinner?" Weasel 4: "Voles." Weasel 3: "What, again???"

Don't know why I'm in such a silly mood at the moment.
mckitterick
Aug. 2nd, 2006 10:00 pm (UTC)
Mmmm... I'm getting hungry now. Voles... tasty.
(Deleted comment)
mckitterick
Aug. 2nd, 2006 05:32 pm (UTC)
I wouldn't mind giant spiders so much as long as they weren't potential murderers. (The "squish" thing is pretty gross, too.)
acommonreader
Aug. 2nd, 2006 04:22 pm (UTC)
I HATE SPIDERS, TOO!
OH mygosh, I hate spiders os much, thatsoundslikeagoodplan, MARRY ME and protect me forever in just this way?! Every ten minutes or so, outside the house, runing streams of poison?! I will ask nothing more beyond the "decent" retirement package, I swear.
mckitterick
Aug. 2nd, 2006 05:34 pm (UTC)
Re: I HATE SPIDERS, TOO!
I would use flamethrowers if I had one, I swear right back!
acommonreader
Aug. 2nd, 2006 05:53 pm (UTC)
Re: I HATE SPIDERS, TOO!
And you know I meant "running," right, babydoll? :)
mckitterick
Aug. 2nd, 2006 05:59 pm (UTC)
Re: I HATE SPIDERS, TOO!
Oh yes, and in fact I did create running streams of poison! Unfortunately, if you see some comments above, I might not have solved the problem. Dammit!
acommonreader
Aug. 2nd, 2006 06:07 pm (UTC)
Re: I HATE SPIDERS, TOO!
Well, then. Hypothetical betrothal OFF. Just like that.
mckitterick
Aug. 2nd, 2006 06:10 pm (UTC)
Re: I HATE SPIDERS, TOO!
Dammit. I meant to say, "Those streams of poison seem to have done the job!"
(Deleted comment)
mckitterick
Aug. 3rd, 2006 04:02 pm (UTC)
Re: I HATE SPIDERS, TOO!
Aw, shucks.
weaselmom
Aug. 2nd, 2006 04:24 pm (UTC)
Oh dude, dude... I don't know what to say.

Somebody tell Mel that she almost made me cry at work, I'm so freaked out.
mckitterick
Aug. 2nd, 2006 05:35 pm (UTC)
You're telling me! I live here... yeah, I'll be hiring some Israeli commandos to complete the mission.
(Deleted comment)
mckitterick
Aug. 2nd, 2006 09:18 pm (UTC)
What I meant to say was, "Brown Recluse Monkeys" (a.k.a. "squirrels"). That is all. They infest the trees in these parts, and sometimes get inside one's home. Nothing to worry about here, move along....
weaselmom
Aug. 2nd, 2006 09:59 pm (UTC)
Hey. HEY. Don't go maligning squirrels by calling them monkeys.

Did you see the news story (flashed by briefly on Yahoo) that in India, monkeys in the subways are a problem, so they're throwing langurs at the problem, and hiring langur wranglers. What I want to know is, what are they going to do for the inevitable langur problem? Throw ocelots at them? Then tigers at the ocelots? Where will the madness end???
mckitterick
Aug. 2nd, 2006 10:04 pm (UTC)

Monkeys: We langurs love 'em!
weaselmom
Aug. 2nd, 2006 11:08 pm (UTC)
Jesus, is that a langur? I think we may have to skip the ocelots and go straight to the tigers. It would have been cool (where cool=horrifying) if they had chosen an intermediate step such as king cobras. I'm thinking that would take care of the commuter problem too.
mckitterick
Aug. 2nd, 2006 11:11 pm (UTC)
"King cobras" as intermediate step - you crack me up! Me, I'd go straight to Gojira. Ooooh, wait, I know: How about we send India all of our Brown Recluses? That'd solve two problems in one!
mckitterick
Aug. 2nd, 2006 10:09 pm (UTC)
...oh, and then you need to throw GOJIRA at the problem! That'll end ALL life! Raaaar!
( 35 comments — Leave a comment )

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