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Alzheimer's is Hell

Not really up to writing a lot about it right now, but just got back from an impromptu trip to Omaha to see my mom. We're down to her last days.

My friends, Alzheimer's is a damned horrific nightmare. If I ever start looking down the barrels of that living hell, well... I wish we lived in a country where one could choose not to endure years of ever-increasing loss of self, health, and free will, knowing we cannot get better, certain that we will get worse, until one day we cannot remember our loved ones or even who we are. That, my friends, is the worst hell I can imagine. The only words Mom has formed in the past few weeks, and those were barely audible: "Have a headache."

Oof.

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Comments

( 20 comments — Leave a comment )
sartorias
Sep. 1st, 2014 05:11 pm (UTC)
I am so sorry you are going through this. Been through it will two relatives, but not a parent. Best wishes and strength to you both.
mckitterick
Sep. 2nd, 2014 01:36 pm (UTC)
So many people suffer from this.
sherwood21
Sep. 1st, 2014 05:23 pm (UTC)
I'm so sorry. I've known another friend who's mother passed from Alzheimer's a few years ago, and I know some of the struggles she went through. It is a difficult and heartbreaking thing to be part of.
mckitterick
Sep. 2nd, 2014 01:36 pm (UTC)
Thanks. It really is awful.
roseconnelly
Sep. 1st, 2014 05:30 pm (UTC)
I'm sorry, and I agree with you. We should have a choice about the end of our life.

mckitterick
Sep. 2nd, 2014 01:37 pm (UTC)
It's insensible that we don't have that option in cases like this.
dragonet2
Sep. 1st, 2014 06:01 pm (UTC)
I am so sorry
That is a tough path.

Hugs!
mckitterick
Sep. 2nd, 2014 01:37 pm (UTC)
Re: I am so sorry
Thanks.
(Deleted comment)
mckitterick
Sep. 2nd, 2014 01:38 pm (UTC)
These new memories just don't fit with who she was. So alien.
curieuse
Sep. 2nd, 2014 12:01 am (UTC)
Oh, Chris, I'm so sad to hear this.
mckitterick
Sep. 2nd, 2014 01:38 pm (UTC)
Thank you.
pointoforigin
Sep. 2nd, 2014 01:09 am (UTC)
Oh my god, Chris. I'm so sorry. As you probably know, that is what my father died of, this January. Please know that I am here if you ever need to talk. And even if you don't need to talk, just know that I care and I will be thinking of you.
mckitterick
Sep. 2nd, 2014 01:39 pm (UTC)
Thanks so much, and I know how long it went on for your father, too. What a horrifying way to go.
saffronhare
Sep. 2nd, 2014 12:58 pm (UTC)
This disease soured the final years we had with both maternal grandparents. I'm so sorry to hear your family is suffering, and hope everyone has the comfort and grace they need most in the time ahead.
mckitterick
Sep. 2nd, 2014 01:40 pm (UTC)
On the plus side, she's not mean anymore. On the negative... well, everything else.
(Deleted comment)
mckitterick
Sep. 3rd, 2014 08:15 pm (UTC)
Thank you, D. I completely agree, and look forward to a day when we have freedom to choose whether or not we go on suffering when there is no end in sight, or only decline.

(And make that a world where others don't decide when to terminate you, too.)
angelmaye
Sep. 4th, 2014 12:45 am (UTC)
I occasionally read your posts on my friends of friends page.

A year ago this past weekend I sat with my grandmother as she passed out of this world after her battle with this viscous disease. I know that nothing any of us says will offer you any comfort. Just know that her suffering will end, and while it might not make you feel better, it will hopefully bring you at least a little peace and or relief. I hope you find the strength to make it through what is to come. My thoughts will be with you and your family.

A.
mckitterick
Sep. 4th, 2014 05:49 pm (UTC)
Good to meet you, A., and thank you for the kind words. I'm so sorry you had to deal with this with your grandmother.
( 20 comments — Leave a comment )

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