You see where this is going.
So I've thrown blankets all over it to prevent her scratching it. Well, That was a bad idea: It only encouraged her to run crazily all over the couch because she was able to dig in. When I scolded her, she launched off the couch and soon started making barfy-sounds (stress upsets her belly). I had to hurry over and give her a nice big dose of Petromalt.
The couch clearly needs real coverage (at least when people aren't over). Upholstery fabric, here I come!
(And no mocking me about getting a leather couch that must remain covered most of the time. Yeah, yeah.)